Absences Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

Saturday I woke up full of happiness because I believe Jorge and I have found our church home.  The happiness was short lived.  While I was getting dressed for our walk for exercise Jorge was having a conversation with his Mama & something told me I wouldn't like what came out of the conversation.  Jorge's Dad was going to Sylvia and Popayan for business and to check on the farm they have in the area.  Jorge decided to go with his Dad and they were leaving me and his Mom behind.  His Mom had a dentist appointment on Monday, and had suffered a recent fall that damaged her back and didn't think she could make the trip.  His mom speaks very little English, I speak very little Spanish.  The idea of being locked up in the apartment in Cali with no one to talk to in English was not my idea of fun.  Plus I've only been here a month and a half and he is off on a guys boys trip?  I was steaming the whole walk, but decided not to say anything about it.  I get Jorge wanted to help his Dad and I didn't want to be selfish.  I actually don't think I was totally over being upset over him leaving me till Sunday Morning when we both were awake at three o'clock in the morning and Jorge said he was hungry and so we got up and make breakfast.  He was like a little sleepy boy and my anger just melted.  So around five thirty we said our goodbye and I went back to sleep.
I woke up around nine thirty hungry.  I couldn't call Jorge cause his Mom was using the phone.  Waiting that hour to be able to call him made me miss him even more.  By the time I called I was soooo glad to hear his voice.  He was safe at his Uncles where he'd had a second breakfast.  We talked about his Uncle and the grill he and his father were picking up and how much we missed each other.  It took me back to our first phone calls when Jorge would call from prison and we'd talk and hang up cause time was up and he'd call back a little later.  The whole day I'd call, we'd talk fifteen minutes or so then hang up and wait for the next call.  Once I called and he sounded out of breath.  He'd just been down in the pasture with Maria, (a woman who once was the family housekeeper and who is the sweetest person) picking raspberries.  We'd pick berries with Maria a few weeks earlier when we were at the farm together.  Jorge sounded so happy and full of energy.  I love that about him.  He is a truly happy and content person, cleaning the house, putting a grill together, picking berries joy flows from him.  I was overwhelmed with love thinking of him and Maria walking through the pastures in search of wild berries.  I thought about our berry picking adventure and how he ate as many as he put in the bucket.  I couldn't help but smile.
I hated the thought of our parting, and it was a hard day without him, but in a strange way it has made me love and appreciate him more.  I love him for the little boy he is picking berries, and for the thoughtful man who wanted to help his Dad.  I love him from head to toe, for the man he is.  I can't wait for him to get back to me tomorrow but if this day without him made me appreciate him more-than it was worth it.  Even if I will hate going to sleep tonight without his shoulder to sleep on.        

I am my beloved's and he is mine

It's been almost 3 weeks for me and Jorge together in Colombia, South Americas and we have already gone through so many emotions and adventures my head spins just thinking about it.

Tonight though, flush with love and straight out of a bible study from Songs of Solomon, I have to express my deep love for my husband and my appreciation that God choose us for each other.  We were brought together by a miracles and evidence God's hand is in our lives shines bright as the morning sun.  First of all we belong to God and that is such a gift to be called son or daughter by the King of Kings.  When we marry though, we belong to our spouse, body, soul, mind completely.  This can be a scary thought with the wrong person.  With the right person, it's one of God's great gifts to us.  All these years of struggle on my own, alone, are gone.  I now have the most loving man in the world to share every up and every down with.  When he wraps me up in his strong arms I feel safe, loved secure.  Jorge has shown me such an unconditional, unselfish, giving love I think I now understand how much God loves me through Jorge's example of love.  When people think of "one flesh" most think of sex, but it is so much more.  It's two people joined to become one mind, one heart, one flesh acting to support one another and only acting in the best interest of each other.  For example, I am not pretty sick.  I get a horrible stuffy nose I have to blow to keep my head from exploding, I hack and cough like an 80 year old chain smoker, and I am cranky.  A week into my arrival and I got the worst cold.  Still have it to a less extreme.  For most guys, the hacking and coughing all night would mean couch time so he could get some rest.  Not Jorge, he stayed up with me, rubbed my back and chest with vicks vapor rub, made me tea, brought me spoonfuls of honey, and stayed with me till I'd finally nod off snoring away with my stuffy nose.  Then he'd cuddle up against me to keep me warm, and fall asleep too.  That's love.

I love you Jorge, completely.  Thank you for showing me such uncompromising and all encompassing love.  I can't wait for the next 3 months, 3 years, all my life with you.      

Can't Stop Smiling

   Tonight Jorge will be transported to his last prison, and tomorrow he will board a plane for Bogata Colombia.  He will be met by his brother Eddie.  Soon after he will be on his way to Cali, to be with his parents.  In two weeks I hope to join him if all go rights.  I feel like I'm on the precipice and about to jump off into a great adventure.

Jorge is free and when he is rested and settled God is going to use Jorge to share the message of freedom through salvation in Christ.  I can not wait to see what God has in store for Jorge.  It's thrilling to know lives will be changed, hearts will be turned to Jesus and I will get to support and help Jorge in his mission to show how great God's love is for us.

Honestly, I know I should be somewhat scared to go to a country I don't even know the language to start a new life, but I'm not.  I know so deep in my heart this is God's will for me I feel safe and self assured. I am starting a blog called the Gringa in Pink about my exploits in a new country, with a new language, a husband and on a farm.  I hope you follow my adventures as well as keep reading how Jorge is being used by God.  :)

God is Awesome

After last Wednesday call from Jorge I called his brother Eddie to tell him the news that Jorge might not come home in May.  He was at a prayer group and promised to pray for Jorge as soon as we stopped talking.  I suggested we wait a week before Eddie tell Jorge's parents about the news as I was hoping for a miracle and didn't want them to worry or be upset.  So after our conversation I prayed with my sister Lauren and I know Eddie and his prayer group also prayed.  

Friday I got up early and called the prison to the Warden's Secretary who was very nice, but she told me I needed to call his immigration officer.  When I called immigration I never got past the person who answers the telephones.  She refused to tell me who his immigration officer was and gave me a big run around.  I felt so helpless after talking to her.  I cried till I couldn't cry anymore.  I continued to call and kept get connected to answering machines instead of people.  I think she did it on purpose.  

The following Wednesday no call from Jorge.  Then Thursday I got a letter basically saying the same thing about him probably not leaving in May and how he wanted to fight it and force them to fly him out of here. His immigration officer, F. Scolnick, even told Jorge, "You better thank God I even came to work today because I almost didn't come to work." Now that was definitely Satan taking a jab at Jorge and his faith and boy oh boy did this guard turn out to be right but not in the way he thought.  

 I took a deep breath to call Eddie back and tell him that maybe we should let his parents know Jorge may not come in May.  Eddie ask me, "Do you want some good news?"  He then told me how Jorge was taken to Atlanta that Thursday and he was scheduled to fly out Monday!  I cried tears of joy.  Eddie said, "Whatever you did it worked."  I said, "I didn't do anything this is God!"  Not only is Jorge leaving in May but he's leaving a week earlier than expected.  So yeah, we thanked God for working a miracle in spite of that officers incompetence.  

Not only did God fix it for Jorge to leave in May, he is leaving a week earlier than we hoped.  Now I am waiting for my miracle to come through for an airline ticket to Colombia so I can join Jorge.  :)  

Satan is Running Scared

Jorge got very maddening news the other day.  A Prison worker came and took his picture and Jorge asked, "What is that for?"  The worker replied, "I forgot to do it with your paperwork.  I will try and get it with your paperwork, but now you may not go at the end of May and will have to wait till the end of June."  My first response was a deep desire to go to that man and punch his lights out.  Of course, I don't know how to throw a punch that would knock someone's lights out, so I guess it's just as well I will never see this guy.  I wholeheartedly admit, that is not the proper Christian response either, but I am only human.

Why would something like this happen?  Jorge has served his time.  He isn't fighting being deported.  He isn't a bad prisoner.  Most importantly, he has served God faithfully this whole time in prison.  Doing twenty years like he has, could have turned his heart against God.  Instead, he praises God for all he does.  So why would God allow this idiot to mess up Jorge getting sent home?

I think the answer is Satan is trembling in his boots at Jorge's release.  Jorge has made such a hugh impact on the hearts and lives of the limited number of people he has contact with now.  Imagine what impact Jorge can have Christ Kingdom when he is free to share his testimony to anyone?  So ppppffffffttt Satan we are not going to let you divert us from God's plans for Jorge.  For that matter, God isn't gong to let you win either.   We are going to dwell in the shelter of the most high, so Satan, to quote Pat Benatar, "Hit me with your best shot."  In fact I think this incident is his best shot and it is lame.  He can not stop Jorge's release.  We serve a mighty and powerful God who can work miracles, open prison doors, and who has wonderful plans for Jorge & I in Colombia.  Jorge was freed from the oppression of his sins years ago, and that freedom is something no one can take away no matter where he is.  Jorge is a free man in Spirit and will soon be in body.

I am standing on Psalms 91  1 

Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
    will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.^[a]
2 I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, 
    my God, in whom I trust.”

³ Surely he will save you
    from the fowler’s snare 
    and from the deadly pestilence. 
⁴ He will cover you with his feathers,
    and under his wings you will find refuge; 
    his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
⁵ You will not fear the terror of night,
    nor the arrow that flies by day,
⁶ nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
    nor the plague that destroys at midday.
⁷ A thousand may fall at your side,
    ten thousand at your right hand,
    but it will not come near you.
⁸ You will only observe with your eyes
    and see the punishment of the wicked.

⁹ If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,”
    and you make the Most High your dwelling,
¹⁰ no harm will overtake you,
    no disaster will come near your tent.
¹¹ For he will command his angels concerning you
    to guard you in all your ways; 
¹² they will lift you up in their hands,
    so that you will not strike your foot against a stone. 
¹³ You will tread on the lion and the cobra;
    you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

¹⁴ “Because he^[b] loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him;
    I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
¹⁵ He will call on me, and I will answer him;
    I will be with him in trouble,
    I will deliver him and honor him. 
¹⁶ With long life I will satisfy him
    and show him my salvation. ”

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Reformed

When I tell people Jorge has been in prison for 20 years, I get the looks.  The are you out of your mind look, or you poor naive fool look, or the sure he's a Christian in prison but he will go back to his criminal ways as soon as he is free.  I am utterly confident that they are all wrong. Statistically he will be going against the odds but Jorge has something going for him the oddsmakers don't figure on.  The love of Jesus Christ burning in his heart.

Jorge isn't the 1st or only one in his family to have fallen to the temptation of fast money selling drugs.  He had 2 brothers who also did time and came out and changed their lives around.  His one brother now teaches English in Bogata.  His second brother got out, snuck back in the US and was working as a JC Penny manager.  True he was illegal, but half the population is nowadays.  He made a big mistake, he went to visit a friend who was incarcerated.  Now I ask, why would he ever go back to a prison after he'd been in one?  He did, he was recognized and ratted on and ended up not going home the day of the visit.  He actually ended up in McRae while Jorge was there.  He got to leave a lot earlier, but seeing his brother those few months was a real blessing to Jorge.  His brother is now in Colombia a successful tomato farmer.

 I know God has great plans for Jorge to witness to his country.  I think a person can be reformed without Jesus Christ.  However, when one is reformed by the love of Jesus Christ no one can take that away.  That reformation is what moves mountains, changes hearts and changes the world.  

JorgeLibre2012!

On April 15th Jorge was officially free.  Unfortunately he didn't get to walk through the prison gates and into my open arms.  Instead he was handcuffed, taken to "the hole" solitary confinement, and left for a few days till he was transported to Ft Stewart Detention Center in Ga.  There he got the disappointing news he wasn't going to be deported the last monday of April and would have to wait another month to be transported out the last Monday of May.  My first call from him after that transfer broke my heart.  On the 15th we talked before he was placed in confinement and he was soooo upbeat and happy and talking about being free and his heart was so full of joy.  "It's over," he kept saying over and over on the 15th.  On the 19th, he felt as if he'd just started a whole new sentence.  The disappointment in his heart, tore at me.   I had cried for days around the 15th full of anger and grief that he wasn't being released to spend his birthday a free man.  On the 19th, he was feeling my previous feelings and it was my turn to be encouraging and lift his spirit.  I was so grateful to be able to be there for him when he needed lifted up.  I immediately mailed him cards and letters sprayed with perfume to help get him through the next few weeks.

It's almost 2 weeks passed since that disappointed phone call.  Every day brings Jorge closer and closer to his flight home to Cali Colombia and I follow him.  A few short weeks till I wrap my arms around him and kiss him and hold him and no one can ever come between us again.  A few short weeks to begin our great adventure together.  In prison Jorge shared his heart and his love of Christ and made an amazing impact on many lives.  Once he is free, look out Devil!  Jorge is going to be a force to reckon with, and the impact he will make on the hearts and lives of his fellow Colombians spreading Christ love and message.  I am so excited to be a part of this great new adventure!  Thank you Jesus for giving me such an amazing husband and opportunity to see you move in the world.

Jorge Libre 2012

2 short days till April 15th and Jorge is a free man.  His debt is paid.  My heart is so happy yet tempered with sadness.  2 days from now I will not be picking him up @ the prison.  2 days from now he will be put into the hole and wait for transport to a new prison where he will wait to be deported.  I've made peace with Jorge being deported.  I look forward to flying to Colombia and jumping into his arms @ the airport.  I just don't understand why they can't deport him faster.  I know it sounds crazy to be anxious 4 him to be deported but the sooner it happens the sooner we can be together.  I look forward to learning his Mom's favorite recipes and cooking for him.  I look forward to waking up with him and kissing him goodnight.  I can't wait to learn how to ride a horse, and spend long afternoons practicing Spanish with Jorge.  I can't wait till he meets our puppy Bessos who will instantly wrap him him around her little paw.

I know we have challenges ahead.  I know life isn't going to be a walk in the the park.  Life with him, will be better, no matter what challenges we face.

The Big Day is Almost Here

On April 15th Jorge is supposed to be released from prison just in time for his birthday on the 18th.  Only I probably won't be spending his birthday with him.  There's a good chance he is going to be deported.  Which means he will be shipped out on the 15th to another prison and held there till they get his paperwork done to deport him.  He could be sent home to Colombia either on the last monday in April or if they don't get his paperwork done in time the last monday in May.  I am so mad at our system for continuing to deny him his freedom after 20 years in hellholes we call prison.  I am also frustrated with God.  Why can't God work a miracle and let Jorge out?  Hasn't he suffered enough.  I know a month or so more is nothing after 20 years but come on.   We've been through so much.  He's been through so much.  I wish I had the faith he did.  I should be jumping 4 joy he is finally going to be free, but even that seems ruined because of the deportation thing and the added time and now I may have to move to Colombia and leave everything I know including the only language I know and my family.  I know in the end everything is in God's hands and will work out 4 the best.  I even think going to Colombia could be the best thing 4 us.  It's just hard.  I wish going or staying could be a decision we make and not a decision made 4 us.  

ON a side and minor note is the fact I will probably have to leave my puppy Bessos with my sister 4 a little while if Jorge gets deported and I am having crazy mad separation anxiety.  I know it's silly and the best thing is to go down get situated, spend time with my hubby etc then bring Bessos back.  I got Bessos a little while after I got married.  She has been with me through all the ups and downs and hard times.  The thought of leaving her breaks my heart.

When I way the pros and cons of staying here vs going to Colombia its a no brainer.  Colombia is better and I should thank the Feds 4 his free plane ride I guess.  Jorge's parents have a beautiful 200 acre farm 4 Jorge 2 run.  Jorge won't have to deal with finding a job and explaining he's been in prison 4 the last 20 years and he won't be stuck in a dead end job with lousy pay.  Plus Jorge needs 2 be around his parents.  He has been separated from his family for 20 years.  Family is all that matters.  I don't want him stuck here away from his family.

I have no control and neither does Jorge.  So I guess I have to let go and let God do what is best and take the leap of faith.  In this case though its more a Grand Canyon size leap.  It's scary but exciting.

Why "The Man Who Smiles"

This probably should have been my 1st blog to kick things off but let's face it-I am blogging like the train of thoughts in my mind.  Which means for you readers buckle up it's gonna be a bumpy ride.  In other words, my train of thoughts seem to go in every direction, which means my blogs will read like a Quintin Tarentino movie.  My blogs will go and from end to beginning to middle then back again, but hopefully-I will pull it all together in the end.

As I state in the about me, I am married to Jorge Rodriguez, who is serving the last 3 months of his prison term and will soon be coming home to me.  All my blogs will be about him and his wonderful way of witnessing to people.  I actually, stole the Man Who Smiles from another writer who wrote a short article about Jorge.  The man, imprisoned himself, heard about Jorge and his long sentence and his good attitude and was intrigued and wrote a short article about Jorge, titled "The Man Who Smiles."  I read it, enjoyed it, but couldn't help but think I could tell Jorge's story so much better.  So here I am telling his story.

The thing that makes me laugh when I look @ the article is that Jorge wouldn't smile that day for the picture in the article.  I have all these great pictures of Jorge smiling his big, friendly smile, and the 1 day he should have flashed his pearly whites the biggest, he didn't.  Men, they are more complicated then we women give them credit for.

The article itself, caused quit a stir in the prison.  Some people cried when they read it.  Others fought over what Jorge said.  Kind of like here on the outside, where some are open and touched by the message of God's love and others get angered by the message.  They don't want to believe, because believing in God's love and authority in our lives, means we have to submit ourselves to God, admit our sin, and realize there is a God.  A God, who is in control, who loves us, and guides our path, but a God who we have to humble ourselves before.  For many today, accepting there is a God means facing themselves and they can't do that.  So they'd rather argue and shout, and live in disbelief.

I am so thankful the article was written.  I am even more thankful, for Jorge's courage to testify to God's love and existance in his life.  So there you have it, the reason my blog is called "The Man Who Smiles."

Life With Jorge

When I picture what life will be like when Jorge comes home, somehow our life turns into old I Love Lucy Episodes.  Only difference is I don't have an Ethel.  I manage to get into trouble all by myself.  LOL  I know Jorge is going to be called into ministry, which scares me because I am not a preacher's wife personality by any means.  I don't know how I know, it's just this feeling in my heart I have of him preaching and sharing his story, the gospel and leading people to Christ.  I just know he is called to preach and teach.  I'll be in the background, slipping out a cuss word or making some other faux pas to embarrass him.  I don't want to be a hinderance to his calling, but I am not sure how I am going to fit in.

Picture a show with a nice, quiet  gentlemanly Preacher going about his work.  His wife on the other hand tries her best to be proper, demure, etc., but never quiet pulls it off.  Kind of like Audrey Hephburn in My Fair Lady, when she goes to the races.  She looked like a lady, walked and talked like a lady till the race started and her real self came out and she screamed at the horse to "get your bloomin arse movin."   Even if I do just smile and say nothing-my skirt would split when I sit down, or I'd be rushing out of the bathroom to get to service & horror of horrors my dress will be stuck in my underwear.  That's the kind of the things that happen to me.  I know Jorge will love me anyways, in spite of my slip ups.  He loves me just the way I am.  His love is 1 of the truest reflections I have of God's love 4 me.  When I see how unconditionally he loves me, I know his love for me is from God cause no human can love so truely, without God.

Thinking about it, maybe the sitcome of our life will give people some chuckles but hopefully it will also demonstrate God's unconditional love for us.  When people get married, often the bible quote read is I Corinthians 13:4-8.  "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

 ⁸ Love never fails."    People quote it as an example of how we are to love each other.  However, it is also a picture of how God loves us.  No matter how many times we mess up, he is patient and waits on us to get it right.  He is kind, and there 4 us when we feel everyone else has deserted us.  God's love never fails.  

Maybe that's where I fit in to the big picture of Jorge's ministry, demonstrating God's unconditional love, even for me.  That's a good place to be in.  :) 

That Time of the Month

Recently, a friend confided to me how her boyfriend had to confess he charted her monthly moods swings based on "that time of the month we women have."  I chuckled, becuase Jorge does the same thing.  Jorge was totally honest about tracking mine.  If I argued with Jorge on the phone he'd say, "It's that time of the month-that's why you are arguing with me."  This would make me even madder, because as right as he was about my schedule, I felt like I was arguing with him becuase he was wrong about whatever we were arguing about.  Jorge would announce my period was coming which drove me crazy, I suffer so bad with cramps, I just like to pretend it's not coming-but nooooo he had to let me know it's coming.  I think it was his way of warning me and himelf, that we had to be careful and nice to each other.  LOL  Right now Jorge can avoid me by not calling for a few days when I'm at my crankiest.  I can't help but wonder though what is going to happen when he can't escape me.  When he comes home, we'll have to learn how to get along while I am at my crankiest.  Now, on the phone he makes me laugh to get through my crabiest of moods.  I guess that's how he'll probably deal with me.  He get's out in April so time will tell.

How I met my Prince Charming

I call Jorge Mi Principe Azule (please forgive any misspelling here as I am still struggling learning Spanish).  According to Jorge it means My Prince Charming in Spanish.  But, I sure didn't think of him that way when we were 1st introduced.  When my older sister told me she gave my name and address to her friend's brother in prison to pass on to his friend, I went bullistic.  I thought my sister was crazy.  I understood why she wrote her good friend's brother.  She had sent the brother a bible and when he wrote to thank her she wrote him back to encourage him.    What was she thinking giving my name to some strange guy in prison?  It wasn't the same thing as a friend's brother.  My sister's reasoning was I was always so good keeping in touch with all my friends, I wouldn't mind writing to some poor guy in prison.  I was so mad at her for imposing on me in this way.  Yet, when the letter came, curiosity got the better of me and I read it.  1st thing I noticed was his letter was well written and the little smiles he drew with big grins were cute.  He wrote jaja for haha a lot, which I think he may have been nervous, but I just thought he thought he was funny.   He wrote he was from Cali Colombia, and having seen every episode of Miami Vice I knew what that meant-cocaine-drug lord-gorgeous house in Miami-ruthless drug lord.  I kind of wanted to write back, but then I didn't.  I dramatized writing back or rather not writing back to ridiculous proportions.  I imagined a Pablo Escabar type guy sending thugs to run me off the road for not writing back.  It took a little while, but I decided what the heck?  I wrote back.  That's how it all began, 1 letter from a shy lonely Colombian to an overly dramatic Gringa from America.  Neither of us had any idea what it would mean to us, neither knowing what God had planned.

A Bloom in Prison

Everyone's heard the saying bloom where you're planted.  It usually accompanies a story where someone is stuck in a job with a rotten boss or facing some difficulty.  How about blooming in a Federal Prison?  A place where your room is, as Jorge says, "a bathroom."   Yet, Jorge blooms.  In a prison full of angry, tired men he is able to share his faith with anyone who is open.  He smiles, laughs, and he is insanely thankful to God for all God does 4 him, including sending me to him ;)  People say to Jorge all the time, "How can you love God when you are here?  Why do you love God when he has not set you free?"  Jorge answers simple, "I know God has a plan 4 me, and he loves me.  From the first time I met Jorge, I noticed something different about him.  He is more free than some men who are not behind bars.  He has this peace about him beyond description in words.  The peace that only comes from relying on God and living on faith daily.  Unlike my boisterous loud manner, he is quiet, and yet he commands attention in a noisy room of visitors.  His smile is contageous.  When he smiles at someone they can't resist smiling back.  Every prison he has been assigned to, he spreads the Gospel with his quiet manner and big smile and humor.  So many times on the phone he has shared how he has told a new person about what God has done 4 him in prison and usually he makes the guy cry.  It kind of seems weird, to hear that tough, hardenend criminals, cry, over a simple story of God's love, but they do.  Why?  Because Jorge is blooming in a place of concrete and weeds.  He brings a message of hope in a place of grey walls and bars.  We can overlook 1 single flower in a boquet, but that same flower, blooming in a field stands out. Jorge is that single bloom, reaching towards the sun, showing the world God is everywhere.